i melt

I melt
Everytime you look at me that way
It never fails any time any place
This burn in me is the coolest thing that i'v ever felt
i melt
Don't know how you do it
I love the way I lose it everytime
What's even better is knowing that forever yur all mine
The closer you get the more my body aches
One little stare from you is all it takes .

i realise i didnt write this but today every time i think of this song i smile and makes me think of some one.

so really this is just to say i havent written much lately but ive been busy. tonight im going to sit down and actually write.

my chest is heavy

My chest is heavy, it feels as if a car is on top of me. My eyes feel like they can fill with tears, enough for a river. My body feels as it wants to give in, wants to let go, wants to cry. Why cant i? Why cant i let go? My mind wont let me, my mind is to strong. I cant let my self get weak, show weakness. I don't want to be strong right now, i want for just one moment to be venerable and just let my self go. Why wont this feeling go away, my chest aches, it burns, is it my heart telling me something; something my mind doesn't want to hear?

i sorry

i feel like crap :( there for my post have been short and sortta meaningless. i will be back to normal soon. i hope. untill then heres a little thought for the day.

you know that person you have in your life who you never thought would mean much to you so you blow them off...well dont do that some of your best friends come from the most unexpected places.

well for now im going to go make me some chicken soup. and try to feel better ill have a better post later i promise :)

my electronic heart beats again

i feel whole again, my cell is back on. yes i live and breath with this i dont feel alive with out it, yes i do understand how pathetic that is but hey im a girl who lives on her phone. i feel disconnected from the world with out it. yes i know i can live without my phone ive done it before and i can do it again but i feel so much better when i do have it. im a bit of a nerd you see. so i can do everything and anything i need to do on my phone, as lame as that may seem its me and im more or less just happy to have it back. and yes my phone is pink, hate on it.

i love my mommy

everyone downs there family and this bothers me more than any thing else does. ( yes this is the beginning of a rant. ill keep it short) when people say im just like my mother it does make me smile and im proud that im like her she raised me and she raised me well. im not going to ever sit here and bad mouth her nor any one else in my family. yes i get mad or irritated with family but hellllllo its gunna happen eventually but common searousally when people just disown there family it sickens me.

stupid girls.

stupid girls, need to mind there own buisness.

the end. really. thats all i needed to say.

good morning

no post till after work sorry. running late. ahhhh work. GO RAYS!!!

amazed

so this boy over here is pretty damn amazing. its one of those things where you realize the one that you want has been there all along. well not all along but a few years is still pretty damn long. i love the fact im always me i dont feel like i have to cake on make up or put on a dress to see him, he makes me laugh and smile and he goes outta his way to make sure im always happy. <3 i might like the whole single flirting party thing but he makes the whole taken cuddled up thing so worth it :)

job

i need a new job. like today. now. five min ago. heck ill deal with tomorrow but i need a new job soon! if any one knows of anything that wud be dandy. :)

Truth

I promised a friend of mine id do this and post the complete truth about everything. So as you, god and Mr Shawn Lane as my witness i will. Ill start off by saying, I'm not the person you think i am , and i can promise you that right here and right now. You may think you know me. You may have herd about me. what i can tell you is your wrong. There is a lot more to me than you will ever really know. I'm not like most girls here in PC although I'm stereotyped because i do live here (& lemme tell you one thing that makes me more heated than you know). Also, i would like to warn any readers whom don't appreciate foul language i do curse, not as much as i used to but i do and i also don't always use proper grammar, but this is not a comp paper nor will i make it as such. i am a very sarcastic person by nature, its genetic, blame my mother (i feel like ill be saying that to a shrink some day ha ha) I'm redoing my original post because it wasn't me, it was more of me testing the site out, and well i did promise to be totally me, so get ready for some ranting and some interesting stuff you never knew that you wanted to know. well for now at least I'm going to go make lunch because i have yet to eat today and I'm starving.

xoxo amt

Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.

This is all new to me. I've never done a blog before. i have Myspace and Facebook but yet never made a blog. so i guess I'm trying something new. some say this is a waste of time but i can see the potential in it so I'm giving it a try. this is a lame first post i realise this but hey I'm just trying to get things up and running and started. my blog is open to any one and every one to read. I'm not guaranteeing everything to be pretty , perfect and entertaining all the time but its all truth and its all real. its all me.